Money And Its Relationship To Inner Value
Money can be a very touchy subject. When I was a kid, my Dad would pay the monthly household bills at the kitchen table. If you came upon him with his meticulously sorted accordion file, it was best if you backed slowly out of the room. This exercise never left him in the best of moods. My biological mother exhibited the greatest crime against her own inner value by committing suicide when I was eight years old. The woman who stepped in to replace her was a Certified General Accountant and I learned that money must be “managed” and luxuries “saved for.” I was raised with a strong Protestant work ethic and the attitude that swam in my veins is that everything must be struggled for and that you can only make enough to pay the bills and you’re lucky if you can eek out the little extra to go camping for a week or two in the summer or to Florida for a week at March Break. We were profoundly middle class.
When I entered my twenties, I got a good job working for the government (because I learned from my parents that a nice secure job with benefits is most desirable). I was fortunate enough to work in innovative groups called “task forces.” We would hire consultants, who were allegedly “smarter” than us, who would come in from the outside, look at our tasks and processes and help us to “reorganize” ourselves to do it differently … over and over again. Basically, these exercises would just pit the innovators against those individuals counting their days until retirement with the “leave me the heck alone” attitudes. It was curious to me that no matter how much I worked for the side of innovation, I was still paid the same amount as the “calendar counters.” And neither of us counted ourselves “satisfied” as neither of us could make a difference or ever be recognized by breaking the glass salary ceiling. While I effort-ed out of my Protestant work ethic, the bean counters proudly touted that they did next to nothing. We were all effectively impotent!
It took me 13 years of living this emotional suicide to recognize that I was destroying my own soul and inner value. I felt trapped in my own limited state of mind. It was at this time, that I began Heilkunst treatment. After taking the remedy Aurum Metallicum (derived from Gold) for “ailments of disappointed love, ailments from business reversals and humiliation, and fears of failure”, I chose to do the only thing that made sense to me. I dressed up my Curriculum Vitae and “became” a Consultant. For the first time in my life I felt a feeling of excitement, almost like I could soar with possibility. The glass ceiling shattered and in the first year, as an outside innovator, I earned double my annual income while only working 9 months of the year. Incidentally, I was doing the exact same work for the government, but I was now being called in from “the outside.” It was brilliant, I worked less hours and I had more time to spend with my small children. I secretly felt I was committing some crime to my WASP-ey heritage.
Over the next 4 years, I innovated organizations both public and private, really getting to know my own inner value. The problem became that I was putting all this glorious effort into organizations, that paid me very well, but the schism lay in the fact that I felt their Management remained stubbornly skewed. At this higher level of consulting, I wasn’t pitted against the state of mind of the workers, but the owners and managers. My core values did not match theirs and I kept getting enmeshed in their politics. I was taking their money and short-falling on the products and services based on our contract. I’d reached another kind of glass ceiling now as a consultant, and I knew that if I continued, I’d keep trying to jam my ethical center down, as my square peg didn’t fit their round hole. I would have to work for myself.
As a Physician, who charges money for her services, I have become a consultant to many clients. My contracts are often entered into on an hourly basis. I exchange my knowledge for some form of the other person’s personal value, usually money. Based on my inner knowledge, and continual learning, my fees have to match my inner value, otherwise, I won’t have the clients who resonate with my present research goals. However, if my fees are too low, I end up working with individuals whose inner value is also depressingly compromised. It is a fine line in which I must always reconcile my inner value with my outer. After 15 years of intensive research, writing, and my own treatment, I have achieved a deep sense of my own inner value. I have attained “orgastic potency” in my work and personal life and so do many of my patients. There is no disparity or incongruency between my inner or outer value. A recession is only a state of mind perpetuated by fear.
The Genetic Miasm, Psorinum, is defined in our Materia Medicas as “poverty consciousness”. It corresponds to the Fall and humanity will show a sharper decline into this state of mind starting about Sept. 21st. If you notice an, “anxiety and hopelessness about the future, pessimism, fears of poverty, health, cancer, the future, failure, restless, anguish, feelings of foresakeness, despair and isolated”, you may qualify for curative medicine. However, if you choose to work with me, you will have to dig down into your resourceful inner value, separate from the disease, and recognize if you are a candidate for “orgastic potency.” Psora is the disease of “lack” – they are “itching to become” and the individual prey to this state of mind will always take a posture, or a position, that is lower than their deeper capability. It is no accident that my mother committed suicide on Sept. 27th and my father died of a heart attack at age 43. Unfortunately, my Dad could not attain a life lived out of a heart filled with self-love and my Mom succumbed to her Aurum and Psora diseases. I know where I’ve come from and I know who I am now.
Some interesting statements I’ve heard recently from clients and friends who may suffer Psora disease:
A friend and client stated, “If Ally raises her fees, I wonder if we can still be friends, let alone continue treatment?”
A friend noted, “Those horse lessons for your daughter must be expensive! Now that I’m fifty, I’ve always wanted to learn how to ride, but felt it was always too expensive.”
A parent of a client stated, “That means that both Physicians are now making $70 more per hour combined for their pocket!”
Some interesting statements I’ve heard recently from clients and friends who have resolved their Psora disease:
A client recently stated, “I know that no matter what happens, I can always recreate myself to meet my needs. I am very resourceful.”
Another client exclaimed, “If I continue living the “abandoned” state of mind, that is what I’ll keep reaping, so from here on in, I am rescued! Boy, that creates some heat in my belly!”
A friend and client noted, “Like Goethe said, once I made the commitment, all the forces in the Universe showed up to support my endeavor. I didn’t need to experience an ounce of struggle as there isn’t any more separation between who I am and what I want. I am abundance and that simply is what is reflected back!”
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- Conscious Breastfeeding
My dear Allyson, three cheers for you!!!
That article is truly brilliant on so many levels. I loved it.
It resonated with me on so many levels but mostly given my own Government work environment ( sometimes unhealthy management structure) and my own path that I have created to be fulfilled and abundant. It also reminded me of those mirrors for own interiors/issues, which we so perfectly create through our relationships and the situations we attract into our lives. There was a time when I only worked and wanted to be around obsessive abusers (syphilis character structures). Some would say just bad luck. I say no, I needed it at the time. What I experience now in contrast is very different and healthy. I feel filled up here (yes its true…lol) and I love being challenged about what my orgastic potency is and can be. As I shift and continue to let go of fears about what my future will look like, I am open to any number of possibilities. How exciting. It starts with such small things to… like the rudder on a ship… you can completely change the direction of your life with small steady movements… and that cannot be mapped out on some “to do” list.
When your notice came out in August about your fees, I chuckled and thought, there will be an interesting mix of feedback on that one especially so close to Psora. My Sister and I even talked about it, on one of regular coffee shop get-togethers because she and I have similar views about abundance and I have watched her go from being “limited” with her earning potential and business owner to “limitless”. “Lack mentality” carries over into everything, ie if you give to them… you cant give to me, there is not enough to go around, not true. We put the limits on.
I am ready for Psora this year, all those symptoms are already in plain view…ha ha, brilliant, truly brilliant.
You are worth every penny (but of course you already know that and don’t need me to stroke your ego)….truth is if you charged double that, I will still find a way.
See you soon!
Your friend and client, (feel free to post parts of this on your website!)