So, What’s It Like In Mexico? A Story of Conscious Grace

Folks often ask me, ‘So what’s it like in Mexico?’ I can tell that they’re trying to get a pulse on the environment external to me. I often answer with another question, ‘What’s it like in Mexico, or what is my life like?’ The answer is often, ‘both.’ 

‘Ok, well Mexico is much like the rest of the world with a slightly less aggressive stance and gesture of false external controls at this moment, but this could change on the spin of a peso. She is mask-uerading (my made up term) on parade because she’s convinced it helps to protect others. It’s a very Christian, Carcinosin state of mind here.’ 

While the present President of Mexico (Obrador), openly took a public stance by announcing the jab-erwocky (another made up term) will never be mandatory for children here, as Big Harma (another made up term) companies are solely interested in making a lot of money, the next President could be another fan of fascism. In my book, I’ve never trusted a politician as far as I could caber toss them.

We’re all seeking a promised land. I get this. I was too. Seven years ago, I was feeling a very profound internal impulse to exit Canada. For me, it felt visceral, profound, almost painful in my organs to remain there; although nothing external was seemingly threatening me at the time. I was compelled in every fibre of my being to leave. 

We had a great little tiny house in New Brunswick that we’d built partially off-grid on a couple of acres. We had some very bad experiences with three local contractors who clearly took advantage of us. I likened it to an emotional and financial rape. 

We also suffered repeated visits from the municipal government, through a gnarly wee tight-assed man, openly harassing and threatening us if we didn’t put in a $13,000 CDN septic system. We were using a composting toilet and recycling our grey water through a rocks/sand filtration system to our permaculture gardens for which I’d researched for decades prior. Others living full-off grid on our remote peninsula weren’t bothered in this way at all. Why were we such targets in such a hostile way in this otherwise pristine boreal habitat?

I was also writing letter after letter, daily, to government officials appealing to them not to institute mandatory jab-erwockies to children in schools. After almost two years, We, The People, won this plea by a narrow margin in the New Brunswick legislature. I thumped my breast and cried a Scottish warrior’s cry, “We f’in won!”  My very unimpressed husband, Jeff, reminded me, “True freedom can never be granted to any human being through a politician.” My breast hissed deflation.

Every year, when I got to Mexico for six months, I felt entirely relieved of these dictatorial pressures. I leaned fully into the impulse of the Madonna, the Mary, the mother of this country. I felt nurtured. It’s fair to say that I often felt surprised and delighted in Mexico, by the people, amenities and the external impulse seemed to work more with me (at a fraction of the cost) as opposed to against me. I felt at home to cry openly and kiss passionately with my husband in the streets. I could be the full monty of my bodacious self here.

At the time, I was researching and finishing my book on Self-Education For Excellence. I also felt internally prompted to do a lot of research on well established eco-villages in Denmark, California and the Carolinas not knowing where this would lead. I wanted to know how they were organized and self-governed. I spent time with a woman setting up an eco-community just outside the city where I lived. I was also studying Misesian economics, Murray Rothbard and following the liberty movement through Dr. Ron Paul.

Years prior to this, I’d put my pin in the sand with regards to conscious creation. These were some of my many statements that I re-committed to daily for almost two decades that would become the life that I would fashion from the inside out:

‘I am abundantly provided for so that I can serve humanity also with an abundant state of mind.’

‘I am profoundly guided, from the inside out, to live a life full of love, pleasure, play and I am fully nurtured and supported by others to this end.’

“I have a home to call my own, and I feel fully content and nurtured in my environment.”

At this juncture, I’m thrilled to say that I have achieved these ends, and more. I was guided to make many different investments that are and have yielded. Our clinic is consistently booked eight weeks out, we’re finally generating a small profit, and I live in an environment that wholly supports me both emotionally and financially. To know me is to know that I’d suffered financial destitution in unimaginable ways for over thirty years. It was harrowing and my adrenals burnt to a crispy piece of fried bacon.

Some of the present daily graces that I’ve fashioned from the inside out include:

  • Weekly kundalini yoga classes with a friend from Ottawa who was very connected to the same community that we came from in Canada.
  • Hiking every other day to different remote sites around our city in the mountains in Mexico.
  • Swimming at the local olympic-sized pool.
  • Regular visits to the hot springs, massage, shiatsu, chiropractor, acupuncturist and Thai yoga massage when I want/need.
  • Dance parties, deep discussions about the world and much overt nurturing and affection with true friends and my chosen Mexican family.
  • The building of our home (with septic) in a community with a beautiful pool, playground for kids and outdoor cooking facilities to have gatherings with friends/family.
  • The fashioning of an off-grid eco-village with beloved friends from our community, here, with gardens, livestock, grapes for wine, figs and olives. I may even have my own horse to ride on trails through the mountains!
  • Living in resonant, tantric, orgonotically rejuvenating love with my beloved partner in life and work, Jeff, where studying, art, music, and meditation are the cornerstones of our life together. Dare I say Bliss!

The feeling is that the bounty of abundant grace is pummeling me at every turn. I am truly overwhelmed. It does help to know that I crafted this eden-like state of being on this earth in abject tumult from my very own consciousness; that twenty-five years of studying the epistemology of knowledge and freedom has not gone to waste, that the former suffering I endured and transcended has finally yielded.

The truth is that our ontological consciousness (ontic – sense of self/individuality) will not fully download until we create pleasure in our very own astral body where our true desire function resides. Suffering and disease will just send the sensitive ontic packin’! I know as I’d formerly created as much difficulty, arduousness, over-work and lack of nurturing for myself as any modern-day Lyme sufferer. It was a mystical/mechanical nightmare!

The thing is folks will want the quick fix to land their own eden-like paraíso. They may even want to come to this town in Mexico to mimic the same. Some will find it, most others will not. Not even remotely.

You see it doesn’t have much to do with Mexico herself, unless you’re fully tapped into her fundamental bounty of her history and meaning and you’re ripe to receive it out of your own conscious orientation. 

The truth is that I was guided here. Others I know who’ve done similar work are living or heading to Germany, Portugal, Costa Rica, France, the UK, the Dominican Republic, etc. The geography doesn’t really matter, the maxim should be ‘go where you’re treated best’ — where you feel profoundly guided to be but also be prepared to craft your freedom before and also once you get there. As you know, your ills have a habit of following you everywhere like a bad outbreak of herpes.

Consciously create your very own freedom cell from your own loins, your true desire function. Craft your spiritual family and also the environment that enables you to do your best work for humanity and consciousness. It’s an inside/out job, not an outside/in one. It never has been, at least not during your lifetime anyway. 

We would not be downloaded with the capacities I described above if it wasn’t within each man and woman to create their own state of grace in their resonant geography of choice. When John Lennon answered his teacher as to the meaning of life, replying that he simply desired ‘to be happy’ and she said he didn’t understand the question and he replied, ‘You don’t understand life,’ he was spot on.

Rudolf Steiner speaks with the same gesture. When I was about to search for just the right passage to share with you regarding this topic, I glanced at the first paragraph for my passage to read tomorrow morning. I was stunned (as I often am) at what I felt guided/inspired to pluck out for you from the book that I’m studying:

“The human being has proven to be the center of the world order. As spirit he attains the highest form of existence and in thinking carries out the most perfect process of the world. Only in the way he illuminates things are they real. This is a view from which it follows that the human being has within himself the basis, the goal, and the core of his existence. This view makes man into a self-sufficient being. He must find within himself the support for everything about himself. For his happiness also, therefore. If happiness is to be his, he can owe it to no one but himself. Any power that bestowed it upon him from outside would condemn him thereby to spiritual inactivity (Unfreiheit). Nothing can give the human being satisfaction to which he has not first granted the ability to do so. If something is to cause us pleasure we ourselves must first grant it the power to do so. In the higher sense, pleasure and pain are there for the human being only insofar as he experiences them as such. With this, all optimism and all pessimism collapse. Optimism assumes that the world is such that everything in it is good, that it leads the human being into the greatest contentment. But if this is to be the case, he himself must first gain something that he wants from the world’s objects; this means that he cannot become happy through the world but only through himself.”

My wish for you to also find your inner happiness, your grace, contentment, your innate optimism, your financial abundance, and your nurturing community. Stop searching for false gods and gurus outside yourself. They’re vapour on the swirling winds, shamans whispering in the pines of an older mystical consciousness. Be your own guru. Everything you need and want is contained within. It is the philosophy of freedom and it’s calling you home within your beleaguered, beaten breast.

Love from here,



Some resources that helped me:

2 thoughts on “So, What’s It Like In Mexico? A Story of Conscious Grace

  1. Pingback: A story of conscious grace and freedom | Enjoying Our Simple Life

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